I had not planned on writing about my recent health issues but realized that i have been googling like crazy and maybe my journey could help some other googler out there.

****MEN: In the writing below i refer to my period.  more than once.  BEWARE!****

At the beginning of April i went off my depo shot.  Since then i have experienced some extreme withdrawal symptoms including sore breasts, weird or a lack of periods, and a case of IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome), apparently from an massive drop in progesterone which can sometimes happen when you stop birth control.  So what is IBS?  According to my research it’s a bunch of BS (sometimes literally).  No one just has IBS, in my opinion, they have an irritable bowel (bloating, diarrhea, constipation, gas, etc)  CAUSED by something wrong in their body.  As someone once told me “physical symptoms are like your cars engine light, they are a sign to look under the hood and FIX what’s wrong”.  We wouldn’t just patch up our broken engine with duct tape, so why do we tend to just throw a band aid on a problem with our bodies?

I have always been lucky enough to be able to eat and drink whatever i wanted.  Nothing really effected me negatively (except runny eggs, which are gross anyway) and i want that back!!!!  Goddammit!!!!  Olives should be the only thing i don’t eat, not because i can’t, but because no one should, they are disgusting.  Anyway, I am now on a mission to cure my body, and since the body is a miracle regeneration machine i know i can do it.  It’s hard, it’s trial and error, but it’s worth it.

First to look into, Candida.  I believe many of us probably have a candida overgrowth problem, caused by our less than stellar diets.  For me this means taking a daily probiotic (just say no to yogurt, try the pills or drinks of living microorganisms that you keep in your fridge for maximum benefit), and staying away from yeast causing foods, mainly sugar.  For example I have cut out sugar in my coffee and use stevia or agave instead.  I also need to stay away from booze, but that sucks and i haven’t been very proactive on that front…man do i love me some booze!  No one is perfect.

Next, gluten.  The silver lining of having a pissed off gut is that i have never been more aware of my gluten intake.  Even though i tested negative to coeliac disease i most definitely am adversely effected by wheat.  Which is no surprise really, the word gluten comes from the latin for GLUE!  It’s not good to eat GLUE!  The good news is that with everyone and their neighbor seemingly effected to some degree by a wheat sensitivity there in an abundance of information and food alternatives available.   Just had rice pasta last night and it was great!

And then, of course….stress.  If you know me you know i am a stress bucket most of the time.  Anxiety and hypochondria being my two main issues.  In fact, here is a an artist rendering of me on a t-shirt:

For those who cannot read what she’s saying (mom) “Oh god, these tights are too tight, i’m think i’m gonna die”

**In case you are wondering, tights CAN be pants IF you are a super hero.  Shirt from Sharing Machine.**

So, stress…..it’s a hard nut to crack.  You can’t just take some herbs and viola you’re cured.  My job is pretty high stress and i totally take on too much when it comes to my social life (Ange once said “your calendar gives me heart palpitations”).  Also i drink too much coffee.  Basically i think i run my body on cortisol which is the hormone your body produces when you are in fight or flight mode.  Not good.  I have started taking 5-HTP, known by some as the happy pill, as it is supposed to help control mood and anxiety among other things.  The article i reference in the ‘cortisol’ link above also lists sex as beneficial in reducing stress and cortisol production.  So i’ll try to find more of that….whatever……

And how about hormones?  I stated at the beginning that i think my issues were caused by a drop in progesterone.  And since i probably have always run high on cortisol it’s time to get my hormones in check.  After 18 years of birth control (holy god, 18 years!….i am old, but not that old, started BC when i was 12 as had horrendous periods that started when i was 9!) i am well aware my body does not even know how to run normally when it comes to hormones.  So into my smoothies goes MACA, which some say aides in balancing hormones.  Some say it doesn’t…well, let’s give it a try because it cannot hurt.  Speaking of smoothies the one i am drinking right now is AWESOME!  Pomegranate/cherry juice, vanilla protein powder, banana, pineapple, and spinach…..yumtastic!

Last but not least, for the pure benefit of relieving symptoms i am taking Iberogast, which is basically a plant derived, healthy alternative to pepto….as nothing that color should ever go in your body.  On your body ok, in your body, gross.

Phew….it’s a lot, and i am not even getting into my journey into raw food and enzymes!  Those are more for long term health and well being and i’m sure i’ll post about that soon enough.

Now i raise my smoothie cup and say “here’s to you, here’s to me, let’s make our bodies the effin’ best they can be!”


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. vanchick
    May 29, 2010 @ 21:07:21


  2. Mel
    May 30, 2010 @ 10:24:36

    I must say I quite enjoyed that post as it was like reading a medical journal. Well done my friend! Much more fascinating then your previous posting on some stupid teenager movie :)I love you!!!!


  3. Josie
    May 30, 2010 @ 16:59:35

    Well written!! It’s fun discovering all the things we’ve been lied to about! Glue is good for you! Eat it at least 5-7 times a day!!


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