You Are Very Star – an Electric Company Theater production, which you’ll have to wait to see…..

When David Jordan* implores you via a Facebook status to see a show, you click the link.  When the ticket buying process asks “Are you are alone?” and then guides you through a series of seemingly random choices that will determine what show you will see, you show up.  Especially if the show is at the HR MacMillan Space Center.  So, last Friday, we ate a yumtastic dinner at the Wallflower and then tripped on over to the Space Center for an experience we were unsure of but totally ready to submit to.

First, we were checked in, given a map, and told to speak with Kai.  We then lingered in the lobby, noticing random clues that we surmised may or may not be linked to our future experience, as well as the poster for the Laser Floyd show, which we figured we could see if this one was a dud.**

Second, we met Kai.  Dressed in scrubs with a Flock of Seagulls hairdo, Kai explained that we were part of a beta test of the show, that  we would start in the Star Theater, and that we were to follow her for the rest of the night.

And what a rest of the night it was.  Jason and I held hands as we were led into the theater, as we gazed up at the dome, and as we took our journey through the Space Center, and through the mind of Mae.

To make a twisty story straight, and so not to give it away when you go, we followed the main character though one of three paths, which were revealed to be part of her dream.

Our path followed her as a child; ordeals with classmates, caring for and fearing for her ailing mother, a funny but lacking baby sitter, a great idea for getting kids into their PJ’s and a science rocket.

As we followed Kai and the character Mae, we became twisted and intertwined with the other two paths, they becoming characters in our stories and I assume, we becoming characters in theirs.

At the end of it all we met a cowboy, a musician, two lovers, and a mother who tied it all up….or not, as it was a dream sequence after all.

Did I understand it all?  No, not by any means.  But it made me wonder, and think, and reflect, and imagine.  Even thought it was the beta test and there were some technical hitches, I loved the show.  It was sad at times, funny at others.  It was poinant and poetic and, at the center of everything that didn’t make sense, there was Mae, and the site, which tied everything together.

As I slow danced with David Jordan tonite (It’s already Fringe lottery time, we drew the lucky shows tonite and there was slow dancing) and we decided that, mostly, we had no idea what had happened exactly at the HR McMillan Space Center that night – but that once the show went live we’d be back, and we’d Facebook implore others to attend.***

*Executive Director of the Fringe!

**It wasn’t.

***Stay tuned, once dates come available i’ll let you know!  Maybe our experience paths will cross 🙂

 

FanFuckingFRINGE-Tastic: What I’ve Seen So Far

Wow, it seems like yesterday that it was only day 1 of the Fringe.  And only the day before that it was just gearing up.  Already it’s day 6, which means we’re more than half way done.  Ok, not going to think about that or i’ll be too sad to enjoy “Dr. Horrible – Sing Along Blog” tonite at the Firehall.

So what have i seen so far and should you try to see them too?  Goddamn it is so subjective.  What my *Frunk friend Carrie gave a “meh” to i saw last night and gave a “meh….GNIFICINT!” to.  So who knows.  Take my word for it.  Don’t.  Come see me at the Fringe Club to discuss.  Ok?

House

I saw Jon do this one man show at the Fringe Club a few years ago and was smitten.  The show is weird and dark, which i love.  Jon is pitch perfect in the role, which i love…of course.  The atmosphere was especially Fringey as it was an impromptu, packed to the rafters event which happened….in the dark.  Yup, all the lights went out and we watched by candle and flashlight…light**  So I had high expectation-memories going in, and they were met with open arms and a lick on the cheek (this is me refrencing the weirdness of the show yo).  My “plus 1” for the night also really enjoyed the show and he had no fond Frigey memories to scew his enjoyment levels.  So, if you are a fan of high energy, oddball monologues with cool lighting and a moment where you think a prop could malfunction and you could walk away with a head injury….and why wouldn’t you….then PLEASE GO SEE THIS SHOW!

Showtimes:

Sep 15 – 9:00 PM

Sep 16 – 7:15 PM
Sep 18 – 5:45 PM

Grab a quick drink at the Havana bar and then go see…

What You Want

Andrew Templeton wrote Biographies of the Dead and Dying last year, which was one of my fave’s of the fest.  Andrew also wrote What You Want, and what he want’s is for you to know it.  Interesting perspective, witty dialog, and a stellar cast make this a must see.  Ignore the lame picture of a duck, the show is much more interesting.

Showtimes:

Sep 16 – 9:15 PM
Sep 17 – 10:00 PM
Sep 18 – 9:30 PM

Next run, drive, bike back to Granville Island for…

Every Job I’ve Ever Had

Ever thought your life was funny enough and interesting enough to create a Power Point presentation about it and tour it across Canada, charging complete strangers money to come hear about it?  No?  Good.  But I am glad Barry did, still does, and really is that funny and interesting.  Seriously, Barry is just freaking hilarious.  I have seen all of his shows except one and am a Barry Groupie for sure.  Go See Barry and learn everything you didn’t know you wanted to know about Every Job He’s Ever Had (there have been a lot).

Showtimes

Sept 15 – 830pm

Sept 16 – 5pm

Sept 19 – 935pm

Ok, i was trying to do this in order of when i saw what but all the wine*** between shows is making it all fuzzy.  So, in no particular order (except in the particular order that they are mentioned in Fringe Guide) –

7(X1) Samurai

Ok, so i had gotten very little sleep the night before, and the theater was so dark and warm….and yeah, i pretty much slept through the whole thing.  SORRY!  What i can say is that the rest of the well rested audience was eating this shit up and dying of laughter.  Pretty good for a mime, i’d say.

Showtimes

Sep 15 – 6:45 PM
Sep 16 – 8:55 PM
Sep 18 – 7:45 PM

Poison The Well

Wow.  I didn’t understand everything that was going on but i think i understood enough.  I am used to seeing Andew Conner as part of Cody Rivers and so to see him in such a serious role was odd.  But his writing was amazing and Elison as Maya simply blew me away (and not just because of her hair, but damn does she have cute hair).  I think that the end could have been tightened up and some of the symbolism was lost on me (and i wasn’t even hammered.  Yet).  Also good to know…fellow Frunk Siobhan shed a tear.

Showtimes

Sep 13 – 5:00 PM
Sep 15 – 7:45 PM
Sep 18 – 9:45 PM
Sep 19 – 5:00 PM

Misadventures of a Massage Therapist

So, by now you are thinking “can we trust these so called reviews?!?!  She seems to like everything!!!  She said she wasn’t hammered during Poison the Well (good thing, that would have been highly inappropriate) but can we believe her?”  Well i haven’t liked everything.  Case in point.  Sorry Jason but i just didn’t think your stories were funny enough.  I thought they were ok, and stories – if happened to me – i would tell my friends….but Fringe show worthy?  Not so much.  At least in my opinion.  That being said, Jason seemed like a fun guy to hang with so maybe i’ll see if i can buy him a drink at the Fringe Club later.  Then i’ll do something so hilarious he’ll already have better material for next year.

When Harry Met Harry

I saw this show on the same day i saw 7(X1) Samurai and couldn’t keep my eyes open.  Before attending this production i pounded a coffee (no boozy rockstars around) and felt mildly better going in.  So, what did i think?  I don’t know.  The “story” was kind of interesting.  The characters were kind of interesting.  It was ok.  That’s all i have to say.  Go see it for yourself and then come find me at the Club to tell me what you thought.

Showtimes

Sep 14 – 5:00 PM
Sep 17 – 10:00 PM
Sep 18 – 1:35 PM
Sep 19 – 6:15 PM

Things That Never Happen

Jenn and i saw the massage therapist one on Jenn’s Fringe Choice Night – and so she needed to redeem herself.  AND SHE SO DID!  What a pick JennyFoo!  Travis the magician is funny, engaging, accomplished with slight of hand and suggestion, and….shhhhh…..REALLY, ACTUALLY, MAGIC!  How the eff else could he do what he does!??!?  Go see this show now.  And sit in the front row.  Or we’re not friends any more.  Not even Facebook friends.  That’s harsh i know but i am doing it for your own good.  Like when The Henderson’s told Harry they no longer loved him.

Showtimes

Sep 13 – 9:00 PM
Sep 15 – 9:00 PM
Sep 17 – 7:30 PM
Sep 18 – 5:15 PM
Sep 19 – 4:50 PM

Die Roten Punkte: Kunst Rock (Art Rock)

OMG.  Seriously…seriously?!?!!!  Astrid and Otto are Muther Effing HILARIOUS and also pretty terrific  song writers to boot.  You will laugh so hard you’ll cry.  Unless you’re lame and that’s not my problem.  BananaHaus.

Showtimes

Sep 14 – 9:40 PM
Sep 17 – 5:00 PM
Sep 18 – 3:30 PM
Sep 19 – 3:55 PM

Moving Along

The only show so far that i have given a standing O to (not as thrilling as a lying down O…hehehe) because it was simply amazing.  Similar writing style to House (fast and seemingly disjointed), played out by a brilliant performer (Chris Craddock)

Showtimes

Sep 13 – 10:25 PM
Sep 15 – 5:05 PM
Sep 17 – 8:35 PM
Sep 18 – 1:40 PM

Freud Vs His Ego

Do you like smart, funny, fast paced, physical theater?  Do you think Ryan Gadstone is a super cutie who you cannot get enough of?  Do you simply adore Monster Theater?  If you said “Yes!” you have already been to see this show, or you are planning on going.  If you said “i dont know!”  then go see the show and your new answers will be yes.  If you said “No” then fuck off.

Showtimes

Sep 14 – 9:45 PM
Sep 17 – 5:00 PM
Sep 18 – 3:30 PM

Jem Rolls: One Man Riot

Performance poetry.  Pretty damn good performance poetry.  If you haven’t seen Jem Rolls you should. If you like being yelled at by a tall, funny, British guy then Jem will be…..a Gem. Oh hardy har har i am so effing funny.

Showtimes

Sep 15 – 6:45 PM
Sep 16 – 8:45 PM
Sep 18 – 7:40 P

Escape Artists II

Weird story, but short, well performed, and on a fire escape.  Which you, yes you…the audience get to walk up and down.  Check it.

Showtimes

Sep 13 – 5:15 PM
Sep 14 – 5:15 PM
Sep 15 – 6:15 PM
Sep 16 – 6:15 PM
Sep 17 – 6:15 PM
Sep 18 – 1:00 PM
Sep 18 – 3:00 PM
Sep 18 – 5:00 PM
Sep 19 – 12:00 PM
Sep 19 – 2:00 PM
Sep 19 – 4:00 PM
Sep 19 – 6:00 PM

The Lover

Well, i have to see more Harold Pinter.  Crazy and awesome.  Blue Velvet-esque.  Performed vividly by the 2 person cast…in someone’s apartment!  That’s right kids…in true Fringe fashion when you see this show you meet at Max’s Deli on Oak St and then are escorted into a 1 bedroom nearby.  Here you sit in the living room and watch the crazy unfold.  I was slightly distracted by the woredrobe….but not by the milk jug humping.  I’m weird like that.

Showtimes

Sep 16 – 7:00 PM
Sep 17 – 7:00 PM
Sep 17 – 9:00 PM
Sep 18 – 7:00 PM
Sep 18 – 9:00 PM

WHOA.  Ok….epic post.  Still in pajama’s.  Need to get ready to head over to the Firehall. See you soon (if not sooner, at the Fringe Club).

*Frunk is a word that if you know what it means you know what it means.  If not don’t worry about it.  Frunks are awesome.

**That would have been easier to type, read, say in a British blog.  It would have said “….by candle and torch light”

***Yes, wine.  As i cannot drink regular beer (muther effing gluten goddammitt) i have been drinking wine.  😛

BC Arts Cuts – Do Something

1) Think about the ways arts and culture have changed or enhanced your world.  Think about the ways you hope arts and culture will continue to change and enhance the world of your family and the next generation

2) Watch this video for even more inspiration

3) Visit Stop BC Arts Cuts pages here and here to learn more and find out what more you can do, including:

Calling your MLA

Join this FB group to be kept up to date on what’s happening

4) Support the arts!  Get out there and check stuff out.  Visit the VAG, check out some live music, see a play and definitely come drink a beer with me at the Fringe Fest!

Things that Kick Ass, on this…a Tuesday

3 things kicked ass today and of course, i will share.

1. The Wallflower Modern Diner.  Sweet little eatery on Main St where the food is delish, the drinks are fun, and the peeps are radical.  It is Main St after all.  If you’re like me, a vegan living on a reduced gluten diet – and you haven’t just killed yourself already – you should visit the Wallflower, especially on a Tuesday, as it will give you a reason to live.  And love.**

Bring all your friends here, if they like to drink and eat, and if not…why are they your friends?  From roast beast stuffed yorkshire puddings to vegan mac and “cheese” to gluten free (and vegan if you can dig it) pizza (on Tuesday’s only as they have to make the crust fresh) this place has it all.  Also a fantastic wait staff and rad wall paper.  done and doner.

**Run on sentences are fun when mildly punctuated with inappropriate punctuation.

2. Groupon.  Today, Ange and i used 2 Groupons at the Wallflower and for 3 drinks and 2 entrees paid only $10 each (and that was with a %25 tip!!!)  It was RAD.  Ok, seriously.  If you have not signed up for Groupon yet you are nothing but a sucker.  It’s free to join, you can get free stuff, the fine print only just makes sense and you can score kick ass deals!  So far i have gotten deals at; Banditas Taqueria (my FAVE place in Van for breakfast),  Grandview Lanes, The Wallflower Modern Diner, Revitalize Now (where i am going to quit smoking tomorrow!!  Eeek!), and Epic (sustainability expo).  I have saved hundreds of dollars.  And again, not signing up means you are a sucker. Dooooo It.

3. Say Wha?! – Readings of Deliciously Rotten Writing.  Well i learned a lot tonight.  About anal clenching, why Snoop Dogg is better than me, what to do when a zombie attacks, and much more.  If you are all “say wha?!” then join the FB group (or if you’re too cool for that (JQ) check out Sara Bynoe’s page) for info on the next show.  And then you can be just as learned and entertained as i am right now.  He he he.

Well kit kats, it’s about that time.  Time for me to pay a visit to the crack bench and then dream some dreams of useless spyglasses.

Peace out yo.

Kinda Raw and Really Drrrrty

Yesterday and today i celebrated the raw and the drrrrty, here’s how.

Raw = yumtastic dinner!  **If you’re only here for the smut scroll down past the 1st picture, no one will fault you**

So my plan was to make a raw marinara to spoon over raw spaghetti squash.  Half the plan went to shit when i tried to get “noodles” out of the uncooked vegetable and got nothing but mush.  So much for the advice of people who said it would work when i googled it.  Bah.  The other half,  though, was awesome!  I learned the recipe from the effervescent Janice Shoreyko of Raw Foundation when i attended a talk she gave a few months ago.

Yumtastic RAW Marinara Sauce!

2 cups roma tomatoes

1/2 cup olive oil

3 gloves garlic (i used 5 as i ALWAYS use more garlic!)

1/2 tsp cayenne (i used 1 tsp as i also ALWAYS use more cayenne!!)

48 sundried roma tomato halves (i used i whole small jar of sun dried tomatoes)

3/4 tsp salt

2 cups tightly packed basil (tightly packed…hehehe)

1 tsp fresh oregano (i used dried and heaped the spoon)

1 tsp fresh chopped parsley (i didn’t use any because how much are you really going to taste 1 tsp?!?!?  And then you have to use the whole bunch before it goes bad!  Although there are many health benefits of parsley….)

1 tsp fresh thyme (again i am horrible and used a heaping spoon of dried)

5 dates, pitted or 2-3 tbsp agave (i didn’t add this at all, but i think i should of.  Why do i think i’m a chef and can just omit things!?!?)

Anyway, the sauce was kick ass!  Fresh ingredients with all of their nutrients and enzymes and it tasted fab.  Even over non-raw rice macaroni.  Whatev. Here’s a pic but be sure to scroll down for the drrrrrty!

topped with cherry tomatoes and avocado cuz i’m fancy like that.

And without further ado….the DRRRRTY!

Ok, so some of you may have read Ulysses, some of you have not….but all of you should read his explicitly sexy (with some fetish thrown in for kicks) letters to his wife Nora.  I heard of these letters last night during the “Say Wha?!?” reading (GO to the next one.  Seriously) and had to share them with you because if ever there was an occasion to exclaim O….M….G it’s after reading these letters.  And how fitting one should utter OMG when referring to James Joyce.  Can’t be too learned and classy ya’ll, it get’s boring 😛

Here’s just a taste, check out the letters here –>http://loveletters.tribe.net/thread/fce72385-b146-4bf2-9d2e-0dfa6ac7142d

I warned you……
Have I shocked you by the dirty things I wrote to you? You think perhaps that my love is a filthy thing. It is, darling, at some moments. I dream of you in filthy poses sometimes. I imagine things so very dirty that I will not write them until I see how you write yourself. The smallest things give me a great cockstand – a whorish movement of your mouth, a little brown stain on the seat of your white drawers, a sudden dirty word spluttered out by your wet lips, a sudden immodest noise made by you behind and then a bad smell slowly curling up out of your backside. At such moments I feel mad to do it in some filthy way, to feel your hot lecherous lips sucking away at me, to fuck between your two rosy-tipped bubbies, to come on your face and squirt it over your hot cheeks and eyes, to stick it between the cheeks of your rump and bugger you.

OMG……

Epic Weekend!

Wow did i ever have a killer weekend!  I would like to send out mad props and big ups to my fab friends, Fighting Chance Productions, the VIBF, and the city of Van for being effing awesome all around 🙂

Friday Night

Got off work and needed a drink.  Thank JC for the amazing concoction known as already mixed vodka and Rockstar.  So not good for me but who the F cares when it’s Friday night and you need something to walk down the street with that won’t bring the fuzz.  Also i don’t think they have it in the States so it’s the one cool thing we have that they don’t.  Suck it States.  While walking i saw one beggar with a sign that read “traveling and ran out of money”.  My thought?  Fucking stop traveling and get a job loser…he wasn’t even trying, he was sleeping next to the sign.  The next beggar i saw had a different tactic as his sign read “need money for a penile enlargement, i’m a little short”…this guy was engaging the public and if i hadn’t been across the street i may have considered donating.

Next stop Fighting Chances production of The Wedding Singer the Musical. Ange, Jenn, Lian, Dorian, and Lian’s new BF joined up.  While it was a bit long it was a great show.  The acting was great, the singing was fab, and the costumes were AMAZING!  A huge ensemble cast all decked out in 80’s gear…nice.  I recommend seeing this show while you still can, because even though they did not (or could not) use all the rad songs from the movie, there was a Christopher Walken impersonator.  So that’s effing awesome.

Saturday Day

Woke up and made breakfast.  Don’t you just love it when you wake up to a clean house, make coffee and then breakfast all while sunshine is streaming in your windows?  If you don’t you’re lame, it’s the best.

Mmmmm, tofu scramble…..

After breakfast i took the ferry across the water to Granville Island do get some groceries.  Once on the Island i was serenaded by a hottie with a guitar singing some Cat Stevens.  Just to me.  And the hundreds of tourists and pigeons.  It was lovely.



We’re in love. He doesn’t know it yet.

After i pulled myself away from the crooning i went into the market and was bombarded with fresh fruit and veg, as well as zillions of people.  Remind me that although GI is beautiful on a sunny Saturday, as a local i have the privilege of shopping in the market on a Wednesday nite….

Armed a cup of my most favoritest blended coffee, the Coco-Mocha Latte from Petite Ami (i remember the day, after going vegan, i walked up and with a sense of impending doom asked….”can you make it vegan?”…..and YES they can!) i braved not only the people but my crap knowledge of fruit and veg.  As a vegan i really suck at identifying what things are and if they are ripe.  I seriously had to look at all the signs in order to find a honeydew melon!  Annnnyway…i love Organic Acres because not only is  everything is organic, it’s all mostly local.

So with 2 heaping bags of awesome fruit and veg i made my way back home.  Boy howdy do i love to people watch in English Bay on a Saturday.  Saw two of my faves, the old couple gearing up to go rollerblading (and i do mean gearing up, they must have bought every pad in the store, cute!) and the slutty jogger.  Yup, the one wearing acid washed short shorts, a bar top, full makeup and false eyelashes…to jog!  Love.

Check out all this rad food!  Yumtastic!

Saturday Night

Chick party, complete with Channy doing makeup, shots of tequila, “this shoe or that shoe?”, blended Sake-Kiwi-Melon drinks, and a pathetic attempt to eat so we don’t get wasted.  Wasted we got.  Although everyone did really enjoy the edamame and spinach hummus (thanks to the May recipe in the Go Vegan calendar).

Fashionably late we made it to the Rickshaw Theater for the Vancouver International Burlesque Fest.  Yee Haw that was good time, from what i can remember.  Lots of local ladies, some new faces, and one burlesque icon.  OH AND MAGIC!!!  Yup, we had a front row seat to all the tassle twirling…AND MAGIC.  I love magic.

Sunday

Slept, watched TV, listened to the crazy sun runners, and slept some more.  Oh and had a Vera burger, fries and gravy.  🙂

Whew…..next weekend’s gonna rock too, stay tuned.  I’m sure i will be.

well hello May, let’s have some fun!

It’s going to be a kick ass month, already filled with radical things to do….

The Wedding Singer – who didn’t love the movie?!?  Adam Sandler was funny and cute, Drew Barrymore was her effervescent self, Billy Idol, while aged, was still pretty effing awesome.  The 80’s clothes, hair, and music….what could be better?!?!  HOW ABOUT A STAGE PRODUCTION?!?!  Although DB whom i adore will not be playing Julia Gulia i am more than stoked about going to see the Wedding Singer live.  Apparently tickets are selling by the bushel so go get yours ASAP!!

Brought to you by one of my favorite theater companies in Van, Fighting Chance Productions!

Vancouver International Burlesque Festival – Tassle’s will be a twirling, and i have front row seats!  Woo Hoo!  Vancouver has a stellar burlesque scene (as far as i am concerned) and so hopefully you’ve been out to see a few shows.  Here is your chance to catch your faves as well as some lovelies from other lands.  Book a table for the best deal, $165 includes 4 tickets to 4 shows and table service, that’s a helluva deal!

Terminal City Rollergirls Rollerderby – i want to be a roller girl!  i have a name picked out!  i want to make fun costumes and skate fast and knock chicks down!  Since i feel this strongly i think it’s time to go to my first live bout.  May 15th i am going to scream for a team and watch some whips in person, it is gonna be kick ass!

The Wild Party – what’s radder than dressing 20’s style, watching a live show at the Anza Club, and getting a free bottle of champagne?  i doubt much at all.

Massive Attack – normally not my thing but some good friends are coming to town and asked me to come with.  i’ve never been to tha Malkin Bowl so what the fuck, let’s give it a go!

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